Joe Collier learns the importance of keeping up appliances Getting old seems almost unreal. As a child, then as an adolescent and later in my twenties, old age seemed a long way off and not much fun. And some things were clear - when old age arrives bodies stop working. Walking sticks, glasses, false teeth…
My little eye
There is more to spying than international espionage. Forget the events that forced Edward Snowden to take up residence in Moscow, Julian Assange in Ecuador's London Embassy, or the conversation that led to a Richmond spy's confession [Secret Newsagent, Greyhares blog, 9 April, 2014], in reality spying or being spied upon is a mundane, everyday affair.…
Secret newsagent
The man who owns the open-all-hours newsagent just round the corner is, as tradition would have it, in the centre of the community. He knows and treats his customers very well. Indeed, he makes a point of greeting us all individually either by first name, by title (Doctor, Professor), or by nickname (in my case Mr. le…
Vive la difference
Travelling in the rush hour is rarely pleasant. Standing, tightly packed, in an underground train is bad enough, but add to that the unique landscape and it all gets much worse. I am talking about close up views of ears, nostrils, pimples, pates and partings, plus the accompanying wafts of halitosis and last night's alcohol.…
Life after teeth
Joe Collier relishes becoming a crusty old man again As I reached the top of the stairs I was overtaken by a man in a hurry mumbling, "Health and Safety..." We were both heading for the Gents and once inside, in fact standing shoulder-to-shoulder, his Health and Safety theme continued. We men generally stay quiet…
Potted Irish
Ask me to read an article quickly and then to recall the key elements and it would be beyond me. Spelling too is very testing, and taking in the facts presented in class or when revising (nowadays in French) takes me ages compared to the time others need. With the aid of tricks learned over…
The unforgotten sound
Without prompting, one of the dinner guests tapped on his glass, asked for quiet and launched into a monologue. His chosen subject - the uniqueness of sounds. He talked about them in terms of their commercial value. He was, he declared, speaking as a marketing man. There was no way of checking his assertions, but…
Double vision
The train was almost empty when my journey started. A few stations later I looked up to find a woman sitting opposite. Though she looked familiar there was a problem. For years I have got into muddles when meeting people, so I needed to be careful. Here was a pretty, young redhead who I thought…
Grauniad of the english language
I imagine most of us have a favourite daily newspaper and for many years mine was the Guardian. It is not everyone's ideal - at my local supermarket the height of the Guardian's pile each morning is less than half that of the Daily Mail - but it worked for me. Not only was it…
A close run thing
Last week we were in the headlines. We watched from afar as the BBC told the UK of freezing weather hitting Canada, and we were there, bang in the middle of it all. We were staying in a small cottage in a forest just two-hours north of Toronto in our son Joshua's new, 'self-built' home. …