This blog started as we travelled to Brittany accompanied by a soft, red-antlered reindeer (see illustration). We were going for our customary Easter holiday in Tréguennec and for this part of our journey we took a train from Paris. After we had installed ourselves, a man in his early sixties with long and untidy silvery hair, took up his seat just across the aisle.

To make himself comfortable, he took off his overcoat and hat and then, after he had taken a book, a tablet, and some earphones from his rather grubby back-pack, he brought out his comforter – his ‘Doudou’ (this is the French version for what our children called their ‘DiDi’, ‘Man’ and ‘Monkey’). It was a stuffed toy reindeer who he later introduced as Arenne*. After some searching, he found a place for Arenne on the shelf just behind his shoulder and for the rest of the journey she sat there peeping out around his right ear. By chance, the two of them, like us, were going to Quimper, the train’s final destination. 

That a 60-year old man should so publicly carry, cherish and display his Arenne was one thing, but it was also puzzling how this rather dishevelled man with no trappings of la richesse, could afford to travel ‘first class’. Such tickets are costly, just as they are in the UK and Rohan and I manage to afford the luxury by having bought French, old people’s Senior rail cards which offer enormous reductions. The enigma of his payment was later resolved with pride just as he said his goodbyes.

At one point, Arenne’s owner left his seat and walked off down the corridor. Rohan and I quickly chatted about what we had seen.  Apart from being surprised about his open, unabashed and very public friendship with his reindeer ‘friend’, both of us had also wondered about his demeanour. In the end we decided that his appearance befitted a man who was once – possibly even still is – a rocker or a hippy. These two observations were all that we had time for – his corridor excursion was very short!

Back to the silver-haired man and his close ‘friend’. For Rohan and I, that a man of his age would bring with him a comforter which he needs to keep close and to display very publicly his relationship, somehow felt wrong. After all, that is what children do. Moreover, when children have comforters they never show interest in sharing them with others – each comforter is a treasured thing for them and them alone. 

In no time, I realised that my view of Arenne’s owner reflected my prejudice, after all, in the UK over a third of adults sleep with a teddy bear and nothing is said. It is also the case that no one seems to care that our head of state – King Charles III – takes with him everywhere his Winston, a much-repaired teddy bear he has owned since his childhood! 

Having been surprised about Arenne, I should have realised that there are actually plenty of quasi teddies that adults carry shamelessly and which go unnoticed. The ubiquitous mobile phone is one such ‘doudou’, which, in keeping, is held close and missed terribly if lost. All that these modern-day ‘doudous’ need is a covering in soft and cuddly material!

As we approached Quimper and our co-traveller was preparing to leave the train, I asked him if I could take a photo of Arenne. He brought her back out of his backpack and placed her on the table in front of him (as in the illustration). At this point we had a chance to talk, and in the short time we had available a soft-spoken, thoughtful man who occasionally broke into English responded to our questions. Firstly, four years ago he had retired and now lived alone near Quimper. Secondly, when he retired he bought Arenne as a way of replacing his children and wife from whom he was separated. Finally, he told that he had spent the whole of his working life employed by the Railways selling train tickets and giving passengers advice. As a reward he now pays next to nothing to travel. As evidence and with pride he showed us his 1.50 € ticket for the journey. Indeed, travelling first class is something he loves! Touché!

There can be few experiences that jolt the mind more than those that challenge one’s prejudices. What we witnessed on our train journey from Paris to Quimper was as challenging as one could ask for.

The illustration is a photo of Arenne as she sat on the train table in front of her owner.

For helping me write this blog I would like to thank Arenne’s owner, Marie, Annie, Rohan and Vivien.

• ‘Arenne’ is a name made-up by her owner and which neatly incorporates the word ‘renne’ which is French for ‘reindeer’.